Live it Right

Life is about making Something out of Nothing at all. If you're able to do that, you're able to do Everything.

Painted Life

Life is like a flower, painted to perfection, yet at the end it wilts, fragile as it is, only the stem left unbroken.

Fallen Leaves

Like the autumn leaves, we fall at times, only to find ourselves blown away by the wind, and thus we reach yet another place.

Prev Next

Losing:My:Composure

In case you haven't notice, I've been writing in English ever since the start of the year.. well, technically, I use my sis com, n she uses mine, due 2 benefit purposes, I nid 2 use her com 2 watch drama, my com de colour too dark, lol...n well, she need mine for the chinese, which is what her com do not have! I can't even read chinese here, it'll all turn out 2 be little square boxes for each character, sigh, neway, anyone that's suppose 2 c this, I hope they do. Coz I hate to repeat myself, n even more, being DIRECT 2 them. 


Okay, went to work as usual today, after work went to my aunt's hse 2 help her with the cookies, my aunt says me byk kuasa, can kerja OT lagi, haha...well, since she asked go over n help lor, she's short of workers, even thou I can oni help xtra 2 hours, but one day 2 hours better than nth la. Neway, my grandma was ther, while they were talking, my grandma mention about my sis bf, she just said "Chao"...which means bro-in-law, haha, then my aunt juz say her...:"Belum apa lagi dah chao chao apa?"...haha...She answer my aunt: "Xpa, dah nak dah, x lama lagi"...dun rly remember, juz writing out wot she means...then my grandma say: "Dak Jane pun ada "Kawan" kan?"...meaning bf ler..lol...n then I juz answer: "Xdela, sibuk je..."...haha...Grandma: "Mane xda, mak slalu nampak"...referring 2 my guy frenz...Me: "I say, ala, kawan je..."...Grandma: "Yala, start2 mmg la kawan..."...well, neway, u get it dun u? Haha, she alwiz ask me de same q, I alwiz answer it differently, bfor this I answer bfor, "Xmau la, laki x leh pakai..."...[no offence guys, JK...=P]...haha...eh well, u noe wot she answer: "Yala heh, skrg byk org jahat, kena hati2..."...=P


K then, honestly, this is for you. Juz realize how much I miss u, evryday counting the days, it's not even two weeks. 13th January, lol...stupid guy. Yea, padan kena gua marah, budak bodoh...blek...juz realize I rly can't find anyone 2 tell evrythg but u, since u already noe a lot, coz I rly dun wanna tell wot's bugging my mind all over again. N recently, I juz dun wanna care anymore. I don't rly wanna giv a damn, guys will alwiz be guys, n I had enuf[of them]. Gonna stop being a NICE & GOOD girl, coz I'm nt rly all that Nice & Good. I juz appears to be, dun be dceived will ya? Juz realize wot I'm capable of, that it kinda scares me. N I hate myself for being that way. It's frustrating, n my mood isn't getting any better. The ones that I hope will accompany me doesn't do so. Instead the ones that I would rather not layan keep finding me for company!!! Argh, stupid stupid stupid...can I have a break already??? Sigh...


Neway, enuf wif that, here's another thg, like it's not enuf I'm working 12 hours a day now, will rly appreciate it if ppl DO NOT FIND ME when I'm bz, I HATE IT alot...that is unless I find u...otherwise, I guess u can juz try ur luck, by nt making me piss at u at that MOMENT, alrite? Duh, I'm rly tired, rly no mood 2 do wot others wan me 2 do, I juz wanna do wot I wanna do. I don't even have enuf time anymore. So I'll appreciate a time of my own. Juz a couple of hours r suffice. Sigh. Ought 2 brg the "Still Thoughts" to work n read it. Mayb then I'll calm down a lil...ever since I start work I juz kept losing my patience. So no offence if I get piss at u 4 no reason. Juz nt being composed, will adapt 2 it asap.


K then, time for a break, time for my drama. Lol..

PS: I Love You.

5 Responses so far.

  1. wa..i get really sense the tension thr..ya..i understand, if u meet my aunts[father's side] u will most likely to get the same problem..tat's y i dont talk to them..and as for u having ur own time..everybody need some time alone to themselves, like having their own space right..it's juz stressful la tat u have to entertain others while busying with something else..

  2. +Hmm, thk u misunderstood my convo wif my grandma, mayb if it's my aunt of uncle I'll mind, but she, I nvr do, haha, even told her that: "Kalo ada, dah bawa balik kasi mak tgk...hehe..."
    +Yea, c, simple equation, u get it, let's hope they do too. =P

  3. Anonymous says:

    hmm..rly sry 4 everythg..xian dint thk it will cum out like tis..我也不知道这是对你的考验还是我的考验,但贤只可以说我们都被考倒了..虽然说没联络你,但你所有的资料,贤都每天留意着..如果真的让你更难受,那证明贤做错了这个决定..贤决定取消那个考验了,只是贤需要知道现在jane能原谅贤的决定吗??只要jane原谅了,贤会自动找jane的..bt usually jane free at wot time??jane can tell xian here or via sms..depend on jane..once again..sry 4 everythg..xian没想到jane会那么无助,对不起...n 1 more thg..it nt 13 january..it was 12 january 8.54am..xian oso counting as jane oso..jz wana tell jane,it oso painful 4 xian..

  4. +Hehe, okay, hmm, rly kinda will make ppl misunderstand, but like hell I care? Haha, ala, u rly baka one la..blek...swt lor..u type sampar 4 hours the msg? 13th oni I got it ok?? Got proof in my inbox..kaka..xD

  5. Anonymous says:

    yahor??xian duno..bt xian jz remember de last sms i get from jane lor..xian count from tat..=)