Sad...sad...so sad...drop my phone, on the tile floor....but the impact is damn teruk, knock on another thg, now can't access my menu ad...die die die...trying 2 reformat my hp here...sigh, u noe I can't slp whenever my little qikely get into comatose state, I'm worried sick, sigh sigh sigh, so sorry little qikely, it's all my fault...again n again n again I slip u from my hand...T.T...emo emo emo...hyez...hope she'll be alrite...
Neway, since I can't slp, might as well write sth now. Well, I juz thought about it, went out with the guys again, go yamcha, coz the girls all can't make it, juz me n 4 guys. Honestly, nt juz thought about it, I've alwiz thk that way. Maybe that's y I rly couldn't accept other guys easily. It seems I keep comparing them to my guy frenz. It's strange I know, I don't love any of my guy frenz, I like all of them. There's this particular group that I alwiz hang out wif. Which includes my lil bro. Whenever I'm with them, I feel safe n sound. It's like they wouldn't judge me, so I rly dun hev 2 be cautious in front of them instead of anyone else. I feel comfortable n at ease instead of when I'm wif some others.
Especially the guys I had crushes on in the past. Somehow instead of making me feel safe and protected, I feel the other way round. They make me feel insecure and mediocre in compare to them. Love isn't suppose to be that way. So I could say that I've never truly loved at all. Not that kinda love atleast...
Neway, wrote the one above laz nite, wasn't able 2 pose it then, well, went to temple this morning, sent my little qikely to repair...T.T..I miss her already, then 12pm-9pm at my aunt house help her make kuih, juz came bak, bath, now blogging lor...yea...I don't know wot I'm feeling now? Tired? Probably, kinda numb, hmm, wth, mayb now I'll get some peace for my mind. That's wot my fren said laz nite, said good la, no one will kacau u ad, then I say him...the problem is I can't kacau ppl leh!! Say he very suka lor, less one ppl kacau him, lol...
Here's the Q for today: Can you choose the one you love? Given the choice, I'll pick any of my guy frenz 2 love, wot's not to love? They're the few guys that do not exploit a girl's feeling n thk love as a game. They're nth like that. But it's not for me to decide. As they say, love will come to you. Besides ur family n frenz. True Love seeks more. Instead of knowing who the other person is. I may love all of my frenz, but it's not that kinda Love.
Yesterday's Q: Why is it that we can do ANYTHING for the ones we Care & Love, but NOTHING for the ones that Care & Love us? For example, a guy u like, evrythg he says, u'll keep in mind. But the ones that has always been ther 4 us, our parents, our friends, y can't we listen 2 them instead? Last nite, a fren of mine said I'm rly "Ti Ki"...my mum alwiz say that 2 my sis, it means stuborn in hokkien. My stomach isn't getting any better. I know it's indigestion+gastric. But I wouldn't take care of it properly. I'm doin myself no good. I know. Somehow, just not in the mood to pay attention to that anymore.
N u noe wot? I love my part time job more than my full time job, lol. That is helping my aunt with her cookies. I don't rly feel tired, but act it's very tiring, my aunt does it the whole day. Wonder how she did it. Which btw, working in a kindergarten, is so not a place for me, coz I myself, am still a little girl. The little girl who refuses to grow up, but soon she'll face the real world. N soon, she'll hev 2 fall down n get bak up on her own. Because by that time, no one else will be around to Save her.
PS: I Love You. J
Neway, since I can't slp, might as well write sth now. Well, I juz thought about it, went out with the guys again, go yamcha, coz the girls all can't make it, juz me n 4 guys. Honestly, nt juz thought about it, I've alwiz thk that way. Maybe that's y I rly couldn't accept other guys easily. It seems I keep comparing them to my guy frenz. It's strange I know, I don't love any of my guy frenz, I like all of them. There's this particular group that I alwiz hang out wif. Which includes my lil bro. Whenever I'm with them, I feel safe n sound. It's like they wouldn't judge me, so I rly dun hev 2 be cautious in front of them instead of anyone else. I feel comfortable n at ease instead of when I'm wif some others.
Especially the guys I had crushes on in the past. Somehow instead of making me feel safe and protected, I feel the other way round. They make me feel insecure and mediocre in compare to them. Love isn't suppose to be that way. So I could say that I've never truly loved at all. Not that kinda love atleast...
Neway, wrote the one above laz nite, wasn't able 2 pose it then, well, went to temple this morning, sent my little qikely to repair...T.T..I miss her already, then 12pm-9pm at my aunt house help her make kuih, juz came bak, bath, now blogging lor...yea...I don't know wot I'm feeling now? Tired? Probably, kinda numb, hmm, wth, mayb now I'll get some peace for my mind. That's wot my fren said laz nite, said good la, no one will kacau u ad, then I say him...the problem is I can't kacau ppl leh!! Say he very suka lor, less one ppl kacau him, lol...
Here's the Q for today: Can you choose the one you love? Given the choice, I'll pick any of my guy frenz 2 love, wot's not to love? They're the few guys that do not exploit a girl's feeling n thk love as a game. They're nth like that. But it's not for me to decide. As they say, love will come to you. Besides ur family n frenz. True Love seeks more. Instead of knowing who the other person is. I may love all of my frenz, but it's not that kinda Love.
Yesterday's Q: Why is it that we can do ANYTHING for the ones we Care & Love, but NOTHING for the ones that Care & Love us? For example, a guy u like, evrythg he says, u'll keep in mind. But the ones that has always been ther 4 us, our parents, our friends, y can't we listen 2 them instead? Last nite, a fren of mine said I'm rly "Ti Ki"...my mum alwiz say that 2 my sis, it means stuborn in hokkien. My stomach isn't getting any better. I know it's indigestion+gastric. But I wouldn't take care of it properly. I'm doin myself no good. I know. Somehow, just not in the mood to pay attention to that anymore.
N u noe wot? I love my part time job more than my full time job, lol. That is helping my aunt with her cookies. I don't rly feel tired, but act it's very tiring, my aunt does it the whole day. Wonder how she did it. Which btw, working in a kindergarten, is so not a place for me, coz I myself, am still a little girl. The little girl who refuses to grow up, but soon she'll face the real world. N soon, she'll hev 2 fall down n get bak up on her own. Because by that time, no one else will be around to Save her.
PS: I Love You. J