Dilemma

Going to apply for my internship.
Seriously in a dilemma,
No idea what I'm interested in,
But then again I remind myself that it's just an internship.
Going to try to apply for tv station, advertising, magazines, or newspaper.
Keeping my options open, and fingers cross that they will actually look into my resume,
Given the fact that I'm not such person with calibre,
I never was, but time and time again I suprise even myself.
When I myself expect me to give up,
But I continue to carry on,
And on the way even get some surprising results.
Was never good in studies,
But I'm proud to say I did try in Uni,
Surprisingly I do better than I expect most of the times,
Even though it's not the best,
I know I did my best. =)

Anyway, back to the internship thingy,
Given the choice, I would have apply for any companies in Melaka,
But no, even though I'm free to pick my own choice,
But I'm always pressured by people's views, people's opinion,
I can't rly make my own choice without proving that I'm doing the right thing,
How can I convince them if I can't even convince myself?
Sigh,
If I could, I would just apply my internship in Malacca,
But some of them expect me to stay in KL,
Even get a job in KL after I graduate,
I seriously dislike KL Lifestyle,
What's more with my personality that is pretty unsociable, ><"
Damn, I feel like a social freak now.
Again, it's not that I don't socialize,
I just don't feel like socializing with Hi Bye Friends,
If you know what I mean?
It's easy to tell which are Hi Bye Friends,
They are the ones that doesn't bother about your stuff,
and most of the times only say hi/bye out of friendliness,
Sometimes I just skip that part and ppl will say I'm stuck up,
I'm the kind of person who choose to disregard how ppl look at me,
Bcoz despite the smiling face those ppl flashes,
None of them are real, none of them means the things they say or concerns.

I seriously cannot imagine myself working under other ppl,
If they are the kind of impatient ppl they will snap at me most of the times,
I'm pretty slow witted and take my time doing stuff. ><"
Damn, I wish I can learn to be fast,
And find the courage to do things,
Even driving is still an issue,
Bcoz I'm always afraid being on the road. =(